Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Showing posts with label funny. Show all posts
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Rent a Hubby?
Ingenious or just plain stupid? I was driving by this house earlier this morning and happen to find a sign called "Rent a Hubby", a handyman service. I found it to be hilarious. Maybe I should rent Mikey out?
Monday, July 21, 2008
interesting
So everyone was doing this on myspace, so I decided to post it here:
Go to urbandictionary. com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the first definition it gives you...
1) Your name? Joyce
A treasured possession (noun) Something you can't live without (Mike should appreciate)
like a good book that you can't put down, full of humour, wisdom, sensitivity (adjective)
Joyce similar to a malapropism (verb) try to do or say one thing and it turns out like another
A verb, meaning to lead someone on and then crush his or her heart like a heartless, souless, biatch that does pineapples and your sister.
A slang in Bulgarian used for Marihuana
to have a camel toe
a purple toenail fungus that is often used as medicine for butt warts
where u spill/slop something on urself, like food, drink, anything, it usually falls upon the breast of the person
2) One of your friends?: Kasia
a polish lasse who is wise beyond her years and has large boobs (so true)
A beautiful female who talks to strangers
Usually a really "dumb" Polish whore who sleeps around with everyone in your town. Also to be considered a homewrecker
3) What should you be doing? Sleeping
To masturbate furiously in your room while praying that your grandma doesn't come in.
4) Hometown? Detroit
A city that a bunch of people talk and complain about but without ever stepping inside the city limits or even coming within 50 miles of its border.
Contrary to popular belief, there are nice parts, but perpetuating stereotypes is better than talking about the good that resides there, huh?
Where everyone who's from Michigan says they're from when somebody asks them where they live.
Best water in the world.
5) Middle name? Elaine
Another term for foxy or sexy.
A silly Mormon girl who will do your Spanish homework for absolutely nothing. Usually of Hispanic origin
6) Car you drive/will drive? Toyota
A supremely reliable car of Japanese design. Formerly imported direct from Japan, now more commonly assembled in the USA.
Most likely any non-Honda car with over 300,000 on the odometer.
A vehicle with normally bland body styling, an underpowered engine, and weak acceleration that is easy on the wallet, and prettymuch indestructible.
A company known mostly for the Camry, that has a produced a few outstanding exceptions to itself. Namely the Celica Supra, and the Mid-Engined MR2.
7) Last person you talked to on the phone? Mike
To do something incredibly stupid. To be retarded and look like an idiot at something.
A gay prostitute who looks like a gorilla, usually found selling for a few bucks around high schools
Go to urbandictionary. com and type in your answer to each question in the search box, then write the first definition it gives you...
1) Your name? Joyce
A treasured possession (noun) Something you can't live without (Mike should appreciate)
like a good book that you can't put down, full of humour, wisdom, sensitivity (adjective)
Joyce similar to a malapropism (verb) try to do or say one thing and it turns out like another
A verb, meaning to lead someone on and then crush his or her heart like a heartless, souless, biatch that does pineapples and your sister.
A slang in Bulgarian used for Marihuana
to have a camel toe
a purple toenail fungus that is often used as medicine for butt warts
where u spill/slop something on urself, like food, drink, anything, it usually falls upon the breast of the person
2) One of your friends?: Kasia
a polish lasse who is wise beyond her years and has large boobs (so true)
A beautiful female who talks to strangers
Usually a really "dumb" Polish whore who sleeps around with everyone in your town. Also to be considered a homewrecker
3) What should you be doing? Sleeping
To masturbate furiously in your room while praying that your grandma doesn't come in.
4) Hometown? Detroit
A city that a bunch of people talk and complain about but without ever stepping inside the city limits or even coming within 50 miles of its border.
Contrary to popular belief, there are nice parts, but perpetuating stereotypes is better than talking about the good that resides there, huh?
Where everyone who's from Michigan says they're from when somebody asks them where they live.
Best water in the world.
5) Middle name? Elaine
Another term for foxy or sexy.
A silly Mormon girl who will do your Spanish homework for absolutely nothing. Usually of Hispanic origin
6) Car you drive/will drive? Toyota
A supremely reliable car of Japanese design. Formerly imported direct from Japan, now more commonly assembled in the USA.
Most likely any non-Honda car with over 300,000 on the odometer.
A vehicle with normally bland body styling, an underpowered engine, and weak acceleration that is easy on the wallet, and prettymuch indestructible.
A company known mostly for the Camry, that has a produced a few outstanding exceptions to itself. Namely the Celica Supra, and the Mid-Engined MR2.
7) Last person you talked to on the phone? Mike
To do something incredibly stupid. To be retarded and look like an idiot at something.
A gay prostitute who looks like a gorilla, usually found selling for a few bucks around high schools
Wednesday, April 16, 2008
My Interesting Pedicure Experience
So yesterday I decided to treat myself to a pedicure at this local place I usually go to. Anyways, as I was picking out my polish color, I see next to me this "woman" next to me (who by the way resembled a tall friend of ours). Or so I thought it was a woman, haha. Then she spoke, and come to find out, it was actually a man, with a wig, and huge boobs (bigger than mine, of course). She pretty much looked like a manly woman. I almost had a chuckle. One that it resembled someone I knew, and two, I was totally not expecting that. Either way, it was pretty funny. By the end of my pedicure, I somehow had managed talking to another woman about 80 year olds with penile implants. I don't even know how that conversation had gotten started.
-Joyce
-Joyce
Monday, February 4, 2008
Superbowl Sunday!
So Superbowl has gone and past yet once again. This time it was actually interesting, for me at least. I'm not usually a football fan in general, but when you have money on the game, it makes it more fun :) Anyways, it was a good time at Konrad's. Good food, more than enough for all, as usual. Thanks to my wife. Commercials were pretty good overall. These were my favorites:
The Justin Timerlake One
The Stewey and Underdog - Very Cute
Bridgestone
Yet another Bridgestone
-Joyce
The Justin Timerlake One
The Stewey and Underdog - Very Cute
Bridgestone
Yet another Bridgestone
-Joyce
Wednesday, January 9, 2008
4 years..wow.
So last friday was our 4 year dating anniversary. Woo woo. haha. Anyways, Mike comes home and said the following:
"Honey, I spent all day writing a poem for you. Here it goes:
It was four years ago on this day, that I knew I wasn't gay. I love you."
Isn't Mike just the romantic. I got myself a good one there. haha.
Then we go to dinner at the Clawson steakhouse (it was good). Just before dinner, he tells me:
"Baby, don't eat too much, because you better be ready for after dinner."
Like I said, he's a winner.
-Joyce
"Honey, I spent all day writing a poem for you. Here it goes:
It was four years ago on this day, that I knew I wasn't gay. I love you."
Isn't Mike just the romantic. I got myself a good one there. haha.
Then we go to dinner at the Clawson steakhouse (it was good). Just before dinner, he tells me:
"Baby, don't eat too much, because you better be ready for after dinner."
Like I said, he's a winner.
-Joyce
Monday, December 10, 2007
Friday, November 30, 2007
Monday, August 13, 2007
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